Chasing The Unfathomable

A girl with a considerably good brain in our society is bound to become a doctor. After passing 12th grade, we all are in a cat race of becoming something.To choose the right university(Actually any good university choosing us to be precise), right career opportunities,Marriage, kids,their education. This life seems to be an unfathomable chase of nothing and after living an 80 or something long life-realizing this is not the way we have planned to live at all.

What happens to the curiosity in a 5 year old kid whose eyes sparkle by looking at all the marvels of the universe unreeling in front of him?

Maybe because life happened to them

It means there’s something definitely wrong with our society. From peer pressures to the general expectations bounded to our kids there are lots of children but less childhood. Suicides rates are increasing. People choosing death over studies.

There must be something wrong. A loophole that is being ignored for so long. A misdeed that is so common that is not even considered a mistake. There’s a difference in knowing the path and walking the path- A difference that many never understand.

So what is the solution? Can we let our kids get swarmed up into the endless chaos of being something or giving them the right to live the way they want to? Wouldn’t it be great if kids of impressionable age our given confidence enough to look into the eyes and say “Yes I have chosen to be an Artist/Musician/chef. Yes I don’t earn equal to what your Engineer son earns. But I am happy. Isn’t this enough?”

Life is short and things are unpredictable. What we think right now cannot be even regarded as an option afterwards. Time changes,Things changes and sometimes even we too. That is why Whatever you think,say it now, whatever you want, go for it.The time is always right to do what is right. Approach it,travel,explore,live the moment.Anxieties and tensions are nothing but a monster that drags you into a black hole. Don’t let that Monster engulf you.Die with memories and not regrets. Keep that five year old alive. Magic lies within you. Don’t let the world fool you-because the pen that writes your life story, must be held in your own hands.

 

THE ON SCREEN RAMADAN

I remember it was 15th of Ramadan and I was lying lazily on a couch in front of my television surfing from one channel to another. It was 4 o’clock in the noon and I saw the entire Ramadan transmission for the first time and decided never to watch it again.the reasons are endless. Either its about the ‘seasonal treat’ we get from familiar faces on our TV screens literally every year  or mind numbing Naats (I know I am up for criticism on this but one thing is for sure we all love Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) more than our parents; his love is a part of our Eeman. But one should be extremely careful in choosing Naats as some have extremely exaggerated meaning which can be categorized in to blasphemy) or the unhealthy trend of distribution of  lawns, mobiles, motorcycles and what-nots. Its such a pain to see our fellow Pakistanis cat fighting over these prizes. It is disgusting to see elderly people imitating a snake or young adults gulping down fruits for such stupid reasons. (Again its the producers who are making such stupid shows for the people who are willing to watch such stupidity. Nothing could stand against those shows when people themselves are ready to sell their self respect for a bike). When you just got over from these painful syndromes and suddenly you are shaken by ‘light light refreshing…Qarshi Jam-e-Shireen’ or any other jingle.  Come on producers, we know how much are ads important for you but at least don’t stuff us with this unnecessary music at these crucial times?

Hmm…let’s see who remains…Oh yes, how can we forget? Our very own, ‘Jack of all channels’, the generous, the unmatched, the intellectual, Our Seasonal Molvis !!! (The people who are so engulfed in their pheni bowls in sehri time that they couldn’t concentrate on what question was just asked ) Instead of focusing on how peaceful and beautiful our religion is they just keep repaeating the dos and donts of each fiqah. *SIGH*

Ramadan is a month of worship and not an excuse for commercialism. Instead of indulging in absurd prize races indulge yourself in reciting Quran Pak. Put an end to Shia Sunni Barelvi superfluous divisions and follow one Islam. That’s what our God wants from us and this is the true essence of Ramadan. :’)

Ramadan Kareem Everyone !

Real Men Don’t Cry

The male gender has always dominated society when it comes to strength and courage. This is the reason, since the day one we have all heard, seen, and maybe even said . “Boys don’t cry” statement in our lives. The society have taught our males to hide their emotions. They are caught in a double bind, put on them by society, the other gender, and their selves. The double bind says that they should be more in touch with their emotions and yet, at the same time, be tough, macho, Mr. Fix-It, and the Family Provider. They are asked to be in touch with their “feminine” side and still retain their “Male” strength.”

From the earliest ,we have told our male counterparts that they are not allowed to be complete. They are always supposed to hide their emotions and to mask their feelings. They are not allowed to be human. That being a “Man” means being emotionally invincible. Denying them the very part of who they are as healthy, balanced and complete human beings – with emotions. We just don’t keep it straight that there are some times a man would feel low and depressed. That they want a place for themselves where they cry their hearts out and can display their inner real weaker version.

According to a new psychological survey, Big boys don’t cry but deep down they’re more emotional than women. The experiment found that men responded twice as strongly as women with higher levels of physiological emotion when presented with heart-warming content. This study suggests that men feel emotion just as much as women, sometimes more strongly, but are less willing to express these emotions openly due to expectations put on them by society.

Instead we teach them that the only acceptable negative emotion that they can feel as men is anger, and require that they replace the healthy ability to feel hurt, pain, disappointment, sorrow – with aggression. We tell them that they are not allowed to be sad but in fact should get mad when things they don’t like happen. To shove the wholeness of their true feelings aside and only ever be angry whenever negative emotions creep up. Because supposedly this is what being a man is all about – being hard and tough. This results in the ultimate male violence and frustration which is being faced by our society since ages.

“If we don’t let our boys cry tears, they’ll cry bullets,”

I may not be a man, but I am a woman. And I know that the same way society has told me who I am supposed to be based on being a “girl” or a “woman” …. is not the way I feel 99% of the time. I know that my strength and resilience know no bounds, and that I have a voice which I never fail to use to assert my truth.
Before we are men, women, gender-queer – we are people, human beings. And the societal designation of daft gender roles or ignorant books that highlight human-made imaginary differences between us need not apply when we choose to be our true and complete selves.

Gender stereotypes about men being stoic and women being emotional are reinforced on us from the beginning.  “It is our responsibility to break the stereotype of what the popular culture defines as a real man.  It’s time to stop complaining about boy’s aggressiveness and men’s lack of emotional availability by taking down the double bind. It is true that males have a problem expressing themselves. But it is also true that they hunger for relationship and affection. They are tire of being cool, independent and always in control. Turn the emotional funnel around and let all of the emotions come out, safely and in a healthy manner. Maybe then it will be O.K. if Men cry…

Teenage Diaries

Yesterday one of my friend called me saying she wants to suicide. Like every other human being, I became panic stricken and asked her what’s wrong with her life. She told me that her crush simply refused her and there is no use of living a life without him.

I told her to be strong to which she replied I can’t . I am not even able to register the truth – let alone to move on.

Situations and characters like these are very common among teenagers like us. Peer pressures, exam problems, acne issues and most importantly heart breaks. Some time it’s really hard to get over a crush or a breakup , you’re giddy with hope for the future — and it’s heartbreaking when you realize it won’t work out. Maybe your crush is seeing someone else, or you just know that getting together is impossible. It’s like heaven and hell at the same time. But letting go and moving on is essential, you can do it if you’re really determined to put your crush behind you and to move on.

Here are some steps to get over your past and to become an architect of your future :

1. Accept your feelings:

Denial would never help you in forgetting the past. You have to accept the truth and kick-start your own inspiration to move on.

2. Brace yourself for ignorance:

In a couple-driven consumer marketing society, you’re bound to come across people who wonder why you’re single, as if the ultimate goal in life is to pair up with another human being and cling to that idea as if your life depends on it. They might even imply that something is “wrong” with you if you’re single. Remember that you don’t have to defend your right for being single, just like it’s rude to attack the validity of someone’s relationship.

3. Distancing yourself:

Try to distance yourself from your object of affection. Take this opportunity to work harder on your studies, and distract yourself from your crush. Every time you’re tempted to think about him or her, open a book, take different routes to class or sit elsewhere at  lunch if you have to.

4.Enjoy your freedom:

Everybody has radical little fantasies…and the chances of pairing up with someone who shares such a fantasy with equal fervor is not something to hold your breath for. Focus on friendships, be more socialized , meet new people,  make friends, appreciate the absence of compromise and live your life the way you want it to be.

Use this time to step back and re-evaluate ways you can improve your own life, instead of devoting all that mental capital to your crush. You’ll find a few distracting tasks to take care of, and you’ll be bettering your own situation at the same time. Don’t make someone else responsible for your happiness. Develop your own hobbies, likes, dislikes, become yourself rather being an after-glow. Take advantage of school. If you’re already attending a school that offers extracurricular activities, get involved! Party-planning committees, service groups, or sports leagues are all possibilities

5. Moving On For Good:

Don’t just transfer your feelings to a new target. Finding a new person to attach all your feelings to is another form of relapsing — you might not be crushing on the same person, but you’re feeling the same emotions. Making someone your substitute isn’t fair to them, because you’re not seeing them for who they are, and it’s not fair to you, because you’re allowing yourself to fall back into the same cycle.

6. Avoid becoming cynical:

Last but not the least , don’t become bitter. When life tests you, it changes you into a complete different person , make sure it is the better version. Never underestimate yourself, because hard time reveals  of what much you are capable of. Never mix difference of opinions and relational failures with personal flaws because self blaming is never going to reward.Don’t punish yourself to try to numb the pain. You don’t want to start overeating or hurting yourself just because your crush doesn’t like you back.

In short be an optimist, dream, have an ambitious life and never stop believing. You never know what’s lord planning for you 🙂

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Life… Or A Beautiful Mess

Life is a complicated thing. Just when you realize that you have  un- Jacketed the  truth, there upon life will spread its enigmatic syndrome upon you. Its complicated, its weird…

But as it is said You only live once, but if  do it right, once is enough. So why make your life a bizarre matter?There is no proper formula of living a perfect life. Its not a mathematics problem which can be solved while being practical. So lead your life just the way you want it to be. Keep it simple. There’s no use of driving a big car when you are having a back bone ache. There’s no use of increments and promotion when you even don’t get time to enjoy it.So sometimes its fine to be crazy and little immature. Life is not a eerie thing. We have made it difficult. Its ok to bunk a few classes, dance like there’s nobody watching,  Sing hearts out like there’s nobody listening, fall in love and live like there’s no tomorrow. 🙂

For this you need to believe in yourself, be optimist, live well, laugh often, and love much;   Because :

“Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won’t either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself you tasted as many as you could.”  🙂

 

 

 

Back To Pavilion

Blogging after four months? Like seriously? It wold have been a nightmare if someone had told me  at the time I started writing. But that’s true, it is exactly that happened to me. Besides- that’s what life is all about. You don’t know what future might be holding for you. Either good or bad, but definitely in your favor.

So from where to start? There have been thousands of events in previous months and recapitulating all of them will be impossible.So there are some glimpse of the events which took place in recent past 🙂

Most importantly there have been my exams – Tough long hard and yea quite boring :/ But now I am done with them so yea whatever :p

“Good byes are always hard”. I really didnt know the meaning of this phrase till I bade farewell to my school. Ten years of school life…. Actually thirteen years (as I have been there since nursery). It was very hard and emotional for me to leave the place where I had spent such a long elapse of time. But as its said that life is like a book where thousands of chapter are unread and every page offers you a new experience so I hope same with my future!

What march reminds you? Probably  Spring roses exams and a national holiday ; but for me there’s one more thing: Its my hatch month 😀 and this time it was more important as it was my sixteenth birthday – SWEET SIXTEENTH ONE 😀 (and whilst being a li’l show off I actually got eighteen presents on my birthday 😛 *Touch wood*) 😀

Well that’s all for this time as not writing for four months habit has coerced me to brainstorm my mind 😀 So have a good time while I  am contemplating for my next write up. Cheers!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Winters <3 <3

I love winters  Just a thought of ‘ winters coming’ gives me a pretty strange sensation and make me to adore this season even more.Though most people always whine about winters as they consider it dull and besotted. William Shakespeare famously told winter in As You Like It, invoking a common complaint about the season: winter is cold, windy, bleak and awful . Now consider the absurdity of such a believe! A cup of hot chocolate, curling up in front of fire place,steaming coffee,dry fruits, getting cozy in your blanket with ear phone plugged in your ears,a good read with raining outside,Foggy nights, short days and a long walk with a loved one. The winter bounties are countless and there are some other aspects  of these blessings too which would definitely make you believe upon winters 😀

1.Getting Fat:
This is one of the best aspect of winters.. You can bundle yourself with lots of warm ups and unlike summers there would be no tight fittings. So you don’t have to worry about your belly fats or thighs getting too chubby 😀

2.Coziness:

An other reason for me to love winters is to lye on flannel sheets and get cozy with my bed. It would be very strange for you to hear that but this season gives me a very homely feeling and yes winters definitely arouses our family insticts 😛

3. Adding layers:

 I must confess the very best thing I’d truly love about winters.I ADORE Winter fashion! Chunky scarves and beanies are my life .LOL. Sweaters, gloves, jackets, boots, long coats and mackintoshes.. Aah..the joy of layering yourself up with warmers is truly a winter treat 😀

4.Winter Veggies:

Nature is very kind on us and had given us a variety of veggies to enjoy in this month like kale, broccoli, cauliflower, celery, bok choy, Brussels sprouts, silver beet, snow peas, broad beans, garlic, onion, lettuces and much more 🙂

5. Guilty Free Lazy Nights:

It’s definitely too cold to do anything after 8.00pm over winter. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. So my favorite spot on a cold winter’s night. Lazing on the bed with a book, laptop or TV, cuddled in my blanket with my favorite teddy.. Oh yea!! 😀